This thing that should be about death and feeling distraught is changing.

Like walking under trees in rain and complaining about the wind and the rain and the noise

and forgetting that I'm there, under the wind and in the rain and listening to the noise

And that just being there, right there is enough.

Jason dying has changed so much but left it the same. It's lovely to be in touch with friends I've not had contact with for years though, his final gift in a way is love. Can't undo his karma but part of me would still like him back even though in the bigger picture it's sort of ok. Well it's beyond me saying it's ok.