Wednesday, September 04, 2013

Communication

Someone recently on the interwebs made the point that ASD communication is often seen as aggressive by non ASD people as ASD people lack eye contact and over explain.

Brilliant!

What is great about this it that explains to me why, when I'm labouring to make a point,the other person is clearly restless.  Although I get that they are disengaged in some way,. it doesn't occur to me its my delivery, not the content that's the problem.  My husband has a wonderful way of staying quiet, waiting until there is a gap in the conversation and talking. Plus he's listened too - I guess he's much more to the point, enunciates clearly and has a deeper voice which helps.

It also explains why people think I'm angry, when I'm not, I'm just making the point.  One of the things we ASD folks struggle with is how to think of different ways to say the same thing. This is a useful technique in a conversation  if one feels one is not understood.  So I'm busy trying to rephrase, whereas in actual fact I need to be stopping and listening.

This also applies to anything I write.

Also - might also explain why ASD can be quite good academics, as well as seeing things so structurally, we also struggle to re phrase.  Our very pedantry probably leads us to exploring detail with a tooth comb, and our struggles to express lead us to more opinions as we try (struggling right now - but I'm not an academic!).