I think Wibbles put her finger on it - the wheel is turning! I also think it will probably always be difficult to some extent with my mum but that's not something I can resolve. Christmas showed me that. I now see it as an opportunitiy to really sit tight and sit deep. And that's cool! Very cool, as obviously that's about having confidence in me. Confidence inspired by Buddha nature and the strength of my practice. Rather then denigrating my meditation all the time, perhaps it's about appreciating the beauty and power of the practice for what it is and letting it ROAR! Roar dharma indeed!
Merit to all beings.