Holding the Universe

Holding the Universe

When you feed yourself to sleep

and I hold you close to me

I'm holding the universe in my arms

A whole wide world unknown to me

Drifting off to sleep.

Pregnant Pause

Pregnant Pause

Twisting in the twilight of the womb

You came to be part of the world

Part of the world just as you are

with your hopes, dreams desires.

Part of the world, just as you are

with a brain that hinders your speech

hinders your smile, hinders your eyes.

A brain that demands perfection,

A brain that see's fear,

A brain that see's this beautiful world

In your own beautiful, unique way.

Twisting in the twilight world

I wish I'd done a better job

Given you a brain that craved love more

Craved eyes, and feelings

Craved touch and sounds and smells.

But this is to unwish you

and that just cannot be done

For you are yourself

with your frightened brain

your anxious eyes

and your ears that hear so much.

Twisting in the twilight world

You came as you are

My greatest teacher

and your own self.

Twisting in the twilight world

You became you.

Let the world outside welcome you.

Together

Together we learn to fight and rage,

scream and shout and bite and worse

and when I wonder about those words

well let's just say I heard it first.

When I wonder about those looks

wonder what is in your books

Wonder where you learned to fight

Wonder where you learnt to bite

and scratch and scream and hate so much

The mirror talks to me.

The reflection in your eyes reminds me.

Then we tickle and laugh and life is good

And now all feels as it should

A breath and I am grateful.

Grateful to you for teaching more about love than I ever thought there was to learn.

Such a day.

Such a day of weeping and wailing,

howling and hailing

emotional thunderstorms too big for our bodies.

The ranting and railing reaches the heavens,

the lightning of words screams round and about

whipping our heads with confusion,

scratching our minds with its talons.

But.

A perfect blue hexagon

No clouds in the sky.

All curled together, loving and laughing.

Perfection as we look to the sky

The day takes a breath, we pause and we laugh

We should jump, we should scream, we should all bounce high

- we are on the trampoline after all

The perfect blue hexagon as we look up,

Aeroplanes the only white in the deep blue sky,

Peace in an unexpected place.

Such a day.